TOXIC Traits of The Western Missionary

Let’s be real, I probably got you by the title. But before we begin, I’d like to offer a disclaimer. If you are easily offended, or just hard at it for world missions, then you do you baby. Being a missionary was one of the best times in my life. However, after coming out of that season, I realize I had many things wrong. And if I can voice those things now, maybe it will prevent a greater need for damage control later on.

That’s all I mean by this.

Now let’s dig in.

I’ve trained. I’ve prepared. I’ve fasted. I’ve read the books. Laid my shoes on the altar. Studied perspectives. Cried over the nations. Raised the funds. Saved money in penny jars. Read Operation World every day. Sang all the songs. Worked extra jobs. Read every scripture that could even relate to missions. I lived and breathed it. Couldn’t wait to get my feet on foreign lands and all of that. Yet here I stand, a resigned missionary of three years—nowhere near close to returning to the field. So, what happened to me? How did I go from a DIE HARD MY WHOLE LIFE IS MISSIONS TO… Sitting here now pointing out “toxic traits” of a western missionary while I watch my daughter throw her food in the floor once again?

What is it that makes me feel like I have any right to give that input? Well, because there’s a reason I came home. Simply put, I had a good heart… but in the deepest part of my core, my traits were toxic.

Striving.

Acting like an American Celebrity.

Living with a Savior Complex.

These are the big three that needed to end. And these are the most common that I see on the field both from hosting short term teams and admiring long termers. These are the things that I see catch up with people.

It’s not moral failure. It’s not lack of devotion to God. It’s not even lack of funds. But instead, it is these things that God has to work out of us… and sadly I even see these things taught in missions trainings (hopefully unintentionally). So, for the love of God and all of humanity—seriously… let’s grow in these areas.

Striving.

Webster defines it as “to make great efforts to achieve or obtain something” or to “struggle or fight vigorously.” I describe it as defying the state of rest. Don’t get me wrong I love a good “hustle bustle” moment, but not as a missionary. I won’t get into the juice here surround outside factors (more for a later post)… but to say it simply… no one is expecting you to bust your ass simply because you’re a missionary. I’m not saying don’t have integrity, good work ethic, or be a good servant or all the things you have been taught. What I am saying is, at the core of who you are… you’re also just a son or a daughter learning how to navigate your way through our existence. You don’t have to fight with all your might to get all the answers right, be the listening ear for every single person you have ever seen, or to even make the perfect post on Facebook to prove peoples donations are in good hands. Listen to me, missionary… breathe in… breathe out. Rest. Live in peace. If you want a Bible verse to make you feel better, what about “seek peace, and ensue it.” Ensue… if you’re gonna strive for something (or ensue it) let it be peace. Not perfection.

Okay next. You’re not an American celebrity.

Let me just say… Some people could care less if you’re western, American, or white. While others may be fascinated by you. But be real, you’re probably fascinated by them too or you wouldn’t have raised $3000 to fly across the world to pray for them. The issue doesn’t come in with fascination, but rather with this small temptation to enjoy the attention you’ve never gotten. Odds are, you’ve never had everyone get up for you when you walk in the room. Maybe no one has ever touched your feet in honor. Maybe no one has ever borrowed money from all their friends just to cook you the best food they can make to show you how much they care. But it may happen on the mission field. Don’t dishonor them by throwing their honor to the wayside… but don’t let that get to your head. Short term teams may have less temptation with that… but when you’re out there long term, a nasty temptation is to “let things slip” like ignoring the cultural atmosphere simply because… you’re a westerner and will be forgiven. That’s literally so gross. Let’s stop this.

Lastly, the savior complex.

Okay. This one could tie into the above point but I’m not meaning it that way… what I’m talking about should maybe instead be in regards to conversion. Point blank, if you’re getting on that plane with the sole agenda to convert people… PLEASE march yourself back off. If that’s your intention and you’re on a layover ON YOUR WAY, just change your mind or leave. It’s not worth it. This is DAMAGING. (2011 Danica is shaking in her boots right now SCARED for the souls of these people)

Look. I get it. You’re an evangelical. You think that if these people don’t hear the name of Jesus they are going to hell and YOU could have stopped them if you would have just raised $3k and flown 9000km and hiked up to their village, used a translator, and told them your testimony and gave them an altar call.

First of all, I hope you hear my heart in this… but do you realize how wild that sounds? Why do you put so much belief in your powers and abilities and so little in the power of Christ or God? And side note: if God was going to make those people and send them to hell because they never heard his name, was there really a point in creating them? Seems like a waste of humanity to me.

Gosh, the savior complex is so deep. But I’m gonna keep it pretty surface. If you look at the life of Jesus… he didn’t go around converting everyone and then going to the next town. Jesus made disciples. Sure, people encountered him… but then they followed him. I’m not saying there is no place to share the gospel or pray for people or any of that. But the Bible doesn’t say “go into all the world and convert them from one religion to the next.” It says go and MAKE DISCIPLES.

I’ll leave you with this, I’ve seen just straight up converts. And I’ve also watched them be the most bigoted and wretched Christians I’ve ever met because they were not discipled. It’s a tragedy and no one wants that. The same people who decided to follow Christ because they went to a crusade have lost their families, quit their jobs, and STILL have no discipleship. It’s not abundant life. And it’s SAD.

If you truly feel CALLED to be a missionary… then like I said, you be you. Please obey the voice of God. But please don’t share your toxicity by going to do this great thing and be the hero. The people in that country don’t NEED YOU. Think about it, they have lived their lives for many years without ever hearing of your name and could continue. But if you choose to go, go to ENHANCE their lives. Do good. Love deeply. Bring them honor. HAVE fun. LEARN FROM THEM. And understand that if you want to change a life through your trip, it will likely first be yours… as you get to encounter another aspect of God’s love through meeting new cultures and people.

Hope I didn’t make you too upset… but seriously. Let’s do better, its people’s lives your messing with.

Alright, now that her whole plate is on the floor, it’s bath and bedtime for my girl.

Peace <3